[[Episode Four]]
“2010”
That was the year the second Space Odyssey film was set
Also, uh.
An actual year
oh hey, this flashback looks to be of the gay couple
Prediction: Murder-Suicide.
(This prediction brought to you by the past three episodes)
I watched this with my housemate Kate
Sassy gay guy was her favourite character in, possibly, the history of everything
Every time he came on-screen, she would audibly squeal
He just admitted to cheating
Cheaters don’t have a fantastic track record on this show
“All of your money and mine is in this house” is a running theme.
The house is like a cash black hole.
It takes your money and compresses it into a singularity
Oh! Gimpy is back
I’ve missed you Gimpy
Gimpy is like Gumby’s fucked-up cousin
Hahaha
I’m imagining that kid’s show now
(it’s terrifying)
I don’t know if Gimpy is half of the gay couple or some supernatural being
It was a supernatural being
this lends credence to Gimpy being the father not Cheaterguy
I want to know who the children in the opening titles are
like, one has to be the child from the first flashback (of the doctor who first lived in the house)
They were once innocent children
And then someone bought them the Gimpy DVD set
Someone egged the house
I wonder if the real estate agent is a ghost
probably the mastermind of the whole ghost operation
‘naww, Neighbour’s lover is hanging out with Adelaide
I just realised that Neighbour is probably not dead
she doesn’t have to be a ghost, she can just have moved next door
Hahaha
Loverboy is adorable
Neighbour is a bitch
Neighbour isn’t that bad
I mean yes she’s awful
But delightfully so
“One minute he’s reading the next minute his hand is down your pants”
Adelaide is seductive apparently.
Australia has a city called Adelaide
Much less seductive.
apparently burnman can only go around in public on Halloween
that’s sad but also not true
dude is always around
oh hey, I just realised that pregnant ex mistress is probably going to come back as a ghost
This ranks right up there with Lost for “shows your character can die on but you’ll still get regular acting work from”.
also Burnman’s basket for the halloween bit was actually full of candy
he’s adorable
“Nate, I cannot see you in this house”
One day someone will listen
“No more weird shit, I promise”
Nate you’re actually a goblin. You can’t keep that promise.
oh hey, they’ve got pumpkins
just like those other people who died
I feel like that’s correlation, not causation
Moira: “Can I have halloween off, I’d like to visit with my mother”
Moira mentions her mother sometimes, I wonder if that’ll come into play
oo! Ghost of the gay couple are seeing the house.
You guys already owned the house!
Silly guys.
Silly gays
Where are their bodies? Moira can’t leave because it’s in the backyard, but these two had actual police collect them
The fluffers hired by the real estate agents are ghosts
this bodes well for my real estate agent is the mastermind theory
Mainlady: “You guys are having trouble?”
Gay ghost: “He can’t keep his dick in his pants.”
How embarrassing!
Adelaide (Addy) was under Daughter’s bed
oh!
She wants to be made pretty like the daughter.
This is super sweet.
Daughter and Addy should get more interaction
They get their own spin-off show
“Down and Out”
It’s set after Daughter announces that she’s gay
Is that offensive? That’s probably offensive.
Addy: “You can’t keep breaking into our house”
Daughter: “But I like it here! My friends are here”
You should probably question that more than you did, Daughter
Yeah I’m pretty sure I’m going to hell.
Neighbour, let Addy be pretty
you bitch
She likes the makeup
it makes her happy
Gimpy! Noooo!
Oh shit, it was Tate
is Tate always Gimpy?????
That’d mean he’s the father
If he got married to Daughter then the unborn baby would be his sibling in law
Oh hey, backstory of the house
about the abortionist bloke
“An eye for an eye”
I’m genuinely impressed with how dark this show was allowed to go
Abortion doctor
That’s pretty freaking dark, especially for America
holy shit, are you going to steal her child?
They totally did
Who is the boyfriend? Who is the child? These characters have to tie in somehow.
This series has got me hooked as shit
Police have come to the door with a box full of jars labelled “evidence”
Did their kid get chopped up?
Oh christ, is the doctor sewing their dead son into all of the animal parts?
This is totally fucked
TOTALLY FUCKED
EVERYONE THIS IS TOTALLY FUCKED
I WANT TO KNOW WHERE THEY’RE GOING
WITH THIS TOTALLY FUCKED STORY
FUUUUCk
I wonder if they’re going to bring back Tate’s fantasy of murdering the people he loves
My teenage fantasies did not involve any of those words
“Murder”
“Love”
“People”
Tate and Cheaterguy are having a psychiatry session in a public place
Cheaterguy is getting all emotional about being a troubled kid
Peter: He’s such a shitty psychiatrist
Tate is comforting him
“It’s gonna be okay Dr Harmon”
oh Tate
you are creepy
Buying Addy a mask of a pretty girl is a nice gesture, but I can only see this going poorly
Oh Xander
You’ve figured out how the show works 😛
The mask is fuuucking creepy
“Where’s Hayden? I said if you lied to me one more time!”
This would make much more sense if I knew who that was
Hayden Christensen
Played Aniken Skywalker in the prequel trilogy
MC is just really passionate about Star Wars
I suspect that is not true
oh
looks like it’s ex-mistress
who is dead
“I wouldn’t expect a call back”
I bet she is going to call back.
As a ghost.
‘Ring ring’
‘Hello?’
‘BOO!’
You know, Mainlady really hasn’t had much go on in terms of supernatural
Cheaterguy has burnman and the murderer adventures
Daughter has Tate
I guess CG has Tate also
It’s actually kind of nice how Addy is friends with all the ghosts
She’s a sweetie
Undead gay couple are freaking out
trying to evict the current owners
oh shit, was that Gimpy?
It did a Tarantino zoom on something, I think it was Gimpy
Someone about to die?
Maybe!
We’ll find out!
Right after these messages!
Oh christ, is the baby about to die?
Mainlady is like, the least deserving of these shitty things
I don’t know if that’s true, but I think I need it to be
holy fuck
Addy wearing the mask is creepy
also the sexy pirates are horrible people
But so sexy
oh no! Don’t run on the road
yup, that’s Addy dead
shit
Well now the spin-off will just be called “Out”
Although, she may have been a ghost already
I really don’t know
I hope she’s not dead
I liked her
Haha, emergency room on halloween:
“No, not his face. That’s a mask. It’s the leg, it’s broken”
Apparently the baby is growing abnormally fast
that doesn’t bode well
aaaaand the doctor has fainted after seeing it
And then they just leave
Like they don’t ask for another doctor or a nurse or even look at the screen
They just go home
Neighbour is dragging addy “home”
probably to keep her ghost around
that’s kind of sweet
Now neighbour is sad
Well yeah her daughter did just die
I think she realised it was too late
Moira is visiting a nursing home
what a mobile ghost
haha
I wonder if her mother knows she’s dead?
She’s still young to all but (I think) adulterers
and old to everyone else
also the mother probably doesn’t know:
She’s in a coma
Aren’t we all in a coma, in our own way?
Nope!
I think Moira’s trying to kill her mother?
So they can ghost-hangout?
Yup, she’s dead
Moira is a murderer
dang
If you’re going to dislike every character who murders someone in this show, you’re going to have a bad time
Mother is behind her, dead
Ma-ra: “Come with me”
Moira: “I can’t mother”
I feel awful for Moira
she doesn’t deserve this
not one bit
🙁
Daughter is going to the door
it’s burnman, screaming to get his money
oh dear
Burnman is chasing away children
“Just keep the door locked”
“Just leave the house and never return”
The season would be a lot shorter, but I guarantee all the characters would be much happier for it.
oh fuck
Gimpy
Please be Nate
Nate is the only Gimpy who doesn’t scare me
and Nate himself scares me
how odd
oh hey, it’s ghost ex-mistress
In the gimp suit?
She’s just sort of there, wearing a level of clothes about midway between “naked” and “full body gimp suit”
END EPISODE FOUR
[[Episode 5]]
The thumbnail is cheaterguy and burnman digging up something
hopefully the body
hopefully also Moira’s body
That’d be nice
then she could go free
and not have to spend an eternity in servitude for sleeping with one person and then almost getting raped by them after breaking it off
Have I mentioned this show is fucked?
Completely and totally
Oh shit, Daughter turned to the left where Gimpy was and he vanished
oh shit
under the bed
fuuuck
regular hand, probably Nate
nope
Nate is downstairs
Nate?
Tate
not Nate
I’m bad at this
Oh Tate
You’re lovely
you painted a rose black for her
You’re probably… SOME flavour of evil
I’m pretty sure that’s not how any of it works
I mean that rose was clearly not painted
It was just…a black rose.
I did not know that was an option
Tate cut up that bully girls face something
not too bad though
deep, but not plentiful
beyond that you seem to just be a messed up kid
“Beyond being a secret goblin you’re messed up”
Aaaand we have our tagline for The Gimpy Show
Tate is having funtime adventures
aw, they’re kissing
wait
he’s totally evil
I don’t think this is good
Evil dudes are the best at kissing
I, uh, assume.
Cheaterguys excuse for grabbing a knife:
“I’m sick of those kids wrecking our house. They broke the pumpkins.”
Cop: “And your plan is to kill them?”
I think Cheaterguys name is Ben but that might be Burnman
I only notice the name said when they’re together
Burnman is called “Larry Harvey”, which is actually a cool little in-joke:
Larry Harvey is the name of the guy who started the Burning Man Festival
They had fun with that
My vague understanding of this show is that each season is self contained horror, so they’ll have to explain some shit in the next 7 episodes
I didn’t know that the first time I watched
I thought each season was about a different family moving into the house
Ben just hit Burnman in the face with a shovel
Ben doesn’t believe she’s a ghost, Burnman is struggling to explain the idea
“The thing about the dead? They have nothing left to lose.”
“I WANT ANSWERS”
“YOU don’t even know what the goddamn question is”
Great line
That camera was first person Burnman, and I was expecting Hayden to sneak up on him
Burnman is pointing
oh dear
oh dear
Ben almost killed Burnman
oh
the pointing turned out to be nothing
The pointing is actually a cool little in-joke:
Larry Harvey, the guy who started the Burning Man Festival
…pointed once.
Allegedly.
I want to dispute that but I don’t know enough about pointing
I like kindly police officer
Please don’t turn out to be involved in this
Tate and Daughter: Totally making out on the beach while spooky music plays
Trust me, it’s the best way to make out
They’ve set a new high
No other making out will ever be able to compare
‘Since the invention of the kiss, there have been only five kisses that were rated the most passionate, the most pure. And then beaches and spooky music came along, and changed everything.’
Ha, Tate’s excuse for not sleeping with Daughter was that the meds mean he can’t get it up.
That was his fear in episode 1
Seems weird that medication would affect the dead
Maybe he’s just not that into her?
“I used to come here” He died there maybe?
Unless he’s the kid of the first house owners
“You can do anything, you can be anything”
especially true for Tate, who is secretly a goblin
He’s tied up in all of this somehow
I genuinely just started wondering if they ever test medication on the dead
That is not a clever thought-train to go down
Oh shit, teenagers
we HATE teenagers
With the hip hop, and the always being on our lawn
Wait a second…
YOU’RE a teenager!
Oh shit, these people are gonna kill Tate
Wait a second…
YOU’RE going to kill Tate!
are they also ghosts?
Friends of Tate when he was alive?
Their faces are messed up, is that Halloween costumes or actual death wounds?
Meanwhile, mainlady is chatting with ex-mistress
This is strange to me
She’s explaining that ex-mistress and Ben can’t end up together
For many reasons
such as:
sex-mistress is dead
Hahaha
“Sex-mistress”
Way better than chess-mistress.
‘I’m risking my marriage because of my love of chess.’
‘My wife and I are chess-monogamous, but I just can’t resist the way you castle.’
“I regret not ripping your smug little face off”
“Way too late for that now”
yup. She’s dead.
The occasional sound of latex is creepy.
Gimpy, where you at?
Oh shit, Gimpy wrote “Ask him” on the bathroom mirror
They think it was ex-mistress
It feels like I should call ex-mistress ex-ex-mistress
what with the death
XX maybe?
That’s easier to type
New nickname time! Burnman is BM, Cheaterguy is Ben, Mainlady can be MC, Daughter can be Daughter still, Hayden/Ex-mistress is XX
Tate?
Tate is Tate
because that’s his name
XX is pissed that Ben closed a door in her face
not so much by the murder
Ghosts in this show are creepy
So many of them just want to bang
I feel like they accurately represent the general population in that regard
oh wow, she just vomited up part of her lungs
“I’m rotting from the inside out”
“A GAZEBO, BEN? Not even a decent headstone?”
He built a fucking Gazebo
I would love that as my headstone.
*makes note*
None of the main characters have clicked onto the fact that these are ghosts yet
BM (hereafter “Burny”) just knocked out Ben and is trying to beg forgiveness of the woman he murdered
murdered most recently that is
(probably)
Oh hey
I just realized: how did this house go from being “mansion” to “student housing” and then back to “mansion”?
Unless the nurses were like, millionaire student nurses.
Welp, jealous gay dead man is about to do some murdering maybe
oh hey, XX is taking a bath
they’ve done a great job of making her look freshly dead
Fun fact: they used an actual corpse for that scene
Ugh okay I immediately grossed myself out with that idea
*scribbles down plot ideas for “Gimpy”*
This dog really hasn’t done anything of interest in this show
he’s barked a few times to be like “SHIT IS FUCKED”
At the risk of spoiling the plot for you
The real-estate lady isn’t the ghost mastermind
It’s the dog.
oh hey, Burny started a fire it seems
dammit Burny
That’s what got you into this mess
Stick with what you know!
Tate is not so good at bullshitting about these people he totally knows
oh!
They killed him
That makes sense
(That’s my theory, not a revelation that has actually happened)
Like, if it’s true it makes sense
XX wants to apologize to MC
oh fuck, Bath full of blood
XX’s blood
God damn this has gotta be weird for MC
oh shit
someone KNOCKED OVER THE PISTACHIOS
GET THE COPS
“Nut cops”
oh fuck, something just exploded in the microwave
oh please don’t have been the dog
hey, it’s the teenagers
the probably undead teenagers
In the microwave?
haha no
at the door
these people are dicks
and look like they’re right out of the eighties
Did Tate kill all of these people?
Maybe?
I dunno
Dude with no bottom jaw is gross
“Pick up a yearbook”
yes, that is what I do when I go to a school
Read past yearbooks
I always hope to find a celebrity’s highschool pic
I guess it’s less likely in Australia, but the hope is still there.
Tate is running
clever tactic
has good returns
so, did Tate goblin the fuck out of these people?
Hahahaha
best verb ever
oh hey, Neighbour and Daughter interaction
that doesn’t happen all that much
oh thank fuck, the dog is alive
unless it’s a ghost?
Ghost dog
Is that a movie?
Ohh
XX didn’t know MC is pregnant
She was about to tell MC she was pregnant
before the murder
and I think MC has realised
oh fuck
XX has some glass
and is about to stab some belly
hers or MC’s? I don’t know
equally fucked
Well I mean one of them is a ghost
Stabbing a ghost probably not as fucked as stabbing a not-ghost
ghost gay guy, it’s not your house any more
oh hey, it’s original lady of the house
“First Lady”
Husband of the Ghost President
she’s totally on Ben’s side
might be the first good ghost maybe?
I don’t know
Moira is pretty good
If you’re okay with euthanasia
Oh!
First Lady has a vested interest because MC is pregnant
and her husband she hated was an abortionist
XX: “I’m going to cut it out of you”
XX don’t do this
oh dear, kindly police officer is holding a ghost at gunpoint
this is how kindly police officers die
If he dies, he could totally become a ghost cop
“Ghost Cop”
I’d watch that movie
Oh man, Addy is totally dead
awww, Neighbour is doing Addy’s makeup
I liked Addy
I suspect that I won’t like ghost Addy
that doesn’t seem like it’ll end well
“When a child dies, it’s immortality that a parent loses”
What a haunting sentiment
Constance? Holy shit, Neighbour has a name
I feel like Moira or First Lady should have been called Constance
Yes Neighbour/Constance, give her a cigarette
that is a healthy habit to support
oh who the fuck am I kidding she killed a woman and taunts her ghost, this is not the worst thing she has done
“Tate is my son”
HOLY SHIT
DAMN
FUUUUCK
I did not see that coming.
Xander, that was a HUGGGGEEEEEE plot twist for me.
You mentioned other childREN though
Addy, Tate, ?
Batman?
Shit, that’d be a twist
WHAT IS NEXT
FIND OUT NEXT TIME
ON AMERICAN BALL Z
So much has happened, but I don’t know that the plot is any further forward
okay no it definitely is
Creepy whistling of that song from Snow White.
damn that’s effective
Every song is just automatically creepier when whistled in an echoey room
Tate does not remember these people
genuinely
OH DAMN
IT’S THE PEOPLE FROM HIS FANTASY
FUUUCK
“I should be 34 years old” oh
Instead of beating the shit out of Tate and killing him, they just chased him down and gave him the finger
how about that
THAT’ll show him!
all the ghosts are returning to the house
dang
looks like we’ve been introduced to all the major players
the nurses, the twins, the gay couple, Moira, First Lady, XX
Gimpy, star of the most fucked-up kid’s show ever.
“Hey kids, it’s Gimpy! He’s here to collect your eyeballs, and crush them up into FUN!”
I think that inside Gimpy is the child of First Lady
the one who First Man fucked up
I believe you mean “Ghost President”
Kindly Police Officer is in the car with XX
“He was the love of my life”
That doesn’t sound true
Kindly Police Officer, shouldn’t you have bars separating you from the backseat people?
oh damn, she disappeared
I forgot they do that sometimes
“The Backseat People” would be a very low-budget horror film
I do not know why I am turning everything into films today.
This scene is just Ben getting ready
he found the broken picture frame
it contains him, daughter, and MC being all happy and shit
This is what I got so far: Ben, Violet, Constance, Tate, Adelaide
I can’t think of any other characters with names I know
Moira
Batman
Gimpy
Gimpy’s best friend Stumpy
(Stumpy’s legs were gnawed off by Gimpy)
(Gimpy was having a bad day)
oh hey, Ben has packed and left the murder house
honestly? Good for him
now if everyone else could leave
including Moira
poor Moira
[[Episode Six]]
so Tate was a school shooter
damn
What a mishmash of people in the library
one of every archetype it seems
This scene was actually based on a very early draft of The Breakfast Club
Tate, you’re a dick
Does the library actually not have a back door?
It clearly does
I can see it
Staying in the one place was probably a good idea though, come to think of it
I feel like in that situation, I’d make a run for it
he shot through the door
killed nice blue shirted man
The “Preppy” archetype is down
Oh hey, it’s the Snow White whistling again
Goth archetype is down
Greaser is down
this is a genuinely haunting scene
Yeah this whole bit was so well done
holy shit
there goes Nerd
fuck
Jock, instead of disarming him in any way you just stood a foot in front of him and said that was enough
How’d that go for him?
Jock is down
Cheerleader is down
Does Tate have a twin I wonder?
Or is he just genuinely evil and forgot?
It has to be the house.
What caused the fucked up house?
The land maybe?
I just can’t believe that Doctor McCreepyFuck and First Lady getting messed up are the problem
Hey
Doctor McCreepyFuck has a name
“Ghost President”
Daughter has just read all of the internet stuff about the school shooting
and the fact that Tate should clearly be dead or aged
This is actually the biggest plot-hole of the show
Addy’s not a ghost, right? She’s just alive
But there’s a picture of Tate – as he was at the time of the school shooting – standing next to her – as she looks now
Unless there’s something about Down’s Syndrome that I’m not understanding
Huge continuity error that’s never explained
Bugs me so much
This show has some phenomenal use of music
These ghosts are always surprised when people don’t just immediately get that ghosts exists
Yeah it’s a bit inconsistent
Based on the school shooting victims, ghosts exist outside the house
Although that was still linked to the house so who knows?
Who knows?
“Have some chamomile tea”
I totally would but we’re all out
“Do you think I wanted a bloody mexican ghost in my bathroom?”
Okay, so Ghosts are a thing in general
It’s way better explained than it was in Casper
Even with the aforementioned plot-hole
“There are some who have an especially violent reaction to being violently murdered”
Yet you very rarely see soldier ghosts
You’d think war-zones would be teeming with them
Maybe it’s because they considered it their duty to die or something
Or maybe it’s because ghosts aren’t real
…could be that, yeah.
oh hey,
They’ve recruited Violet to get Tate to cross over
Jesus, Violet’s grandmother told her
“They don’t understand you. They’ll never understand you”
What a constructive thing to say
MC is rubbing her pregnant belly
aaaaand therere is a claw
“Therere”
The spookiest form of “there”
oh thank god it was a dream
First use of CG I’ve really noticed in the show
There, they’re, their, and – for situations relating to ghosts and ghouls – therere.
MC, you about to seduce Kindly Police Officer?
He’s too cool for you
(Oh please don’t die Kindly Police Officer)
Kindly Police Officer: “My wife cheated on me”
MC: “With another man?”
Why is that your first question?
Like, it turned out to be a woman
but how could you have known that?
Vivien!
Okay, a lot of characters are now named.
Good.
She’ll always be “Coach’s Wife” to me
What in?
Friday Night Lights
She’s great in that
Oh hey, kind of boring marital difficulties drama
oh no
Don’t cut Violet please don’t
shit, not your throat
I understand it’s a very real issue that a lot of people struggle with
But cutting squicks the hell out of me
This guy’s younger brothers held him down and told him horror stories
this HAS to tie in
HE is great in Modern Family
They just generally did a great job casting for this show
I feel bad for him
This is a good horror story
“Piggy man”
Hogbutcher in Chicago
oh christ, so many horror story victims are completely innocent
Yeah it drives me mad
I have a very strong sense of fairness
And you can’t go into a horror movie or show with that
(or a sitcom, as I’m learning)
I have the exact same problem
holy fuck
that was a good jump scare
I thought it’d be a total letdown
that nothing would happen
nope, brutal murder
in a fantasy, but still a surprise
A well-executed jump scare is a beautiful thing
On par with a really great joke
“I want you to shave”
PROFESSIONAL PSYCHIATRIST
Violet is all sadly
“I have you”
The music playing over that line makes it much more sinister
Good use of music
also red herrings
I wonder what’ll be important
can’t be everything, too many hooks
I mean
The aim of the show is to spook and entertain
So anything that does that is “important”
It’s not like a murder mystery, where there’s a big reveal at the end and you get to see what mattered
Constance is coping well with Addy’s death apparently
I wasn’t so sold on Constance for a while
Who doesn’t love Constance?
oh right
she killed Moira
that’s why
I forgot that
and she also steals from Vivien and taunts Moira about her eternal suffering
I still love Constance.
“Cheating is on par with murder”
That’s… not so true
I want to say “Americans” and roll my eyes, but it’s just generally a very common attitude
Not just in America
“Ben will cheat again if given half a chance”
He resisted you for a lot of seduction, Moira
not old Moira either
YOUNG Moira
the attractive one
No offence to old moira
I’m sure that you can get as many men as you want
You know what?
I’m surprised that Ben hasn’t slept with young Moira, and that everyone else hasn’t slept with old Moira.
Prepared to be erotically overwhelmed?
Old Moira making out with young Moira.
Your pants can thank me later
Oh please don’t get murdered by this butcher guy
I like you, dude-from-Modern-Family
oh christ
I agree with Ben so much on the whole “There’s no such thing as spirits” attitude
except that it’s proven to be true in this show
multiple times
Haha yeah
The ultimate atheist frustration
is the piggy there?
I gotsta know
oh fuck
it’s not the piggy
it was the nurse
she’s in the mirror
christing shitfuckery
Her eyes: Not normally bleeding!
That wasn’t normal!
Meanwhile: “I’m the daddy”
the zoom on Viviens face at that points is totally fucking suss
SUSS
“I owe you an apology”
Oh wow, it’s cocaine-bully
haven’t seen her for a few episodes
she’s gettin’ all Christian on Violet
Don’t jack her pills, Violet
They were not prescribed to you
She do what she want, Xander
You ain’t the boss of her
I guess I’m not that big either.
oh man, she’s at the library
where all the kids died
“died”
Were horribly murdered
Violet: “I just wanna know why he did it”
Guy: “Me too.”
Oh hey, this guy is Preppy kid
turns out he was a teacher
not a preppy kid
Still working at the same place, of course
I mean I get that it would be bad writing if he got a new job and we never saw him again
But yeah
Little bit silly
“Good people don’t just have a bad day start killing people”
See: The Joker
He tried to prove that
didn’t work
Moira is adorable
working for free
I mean, she does live there
secretly
I think I would be okay with people secretly living in my house
If it meant I got a free maid out of it
Why does she keep going for this raw meat shit?
Moira, what are you playing at?
Oh my
it’s brain
Vivien seems unenthused
but completely willing
she’s enjoying it, in fact
Please don’t turn out to be human brain
or something equally fucked
For the record, eating any kind of brain is considered a bad idea
Medically speaking
With an eating montage, they best have some payoff for that
‘Food fight!’
Gimpy?
That you buddy?
So Violet is the first person to find out about ghosts
which gives her points for survival
she just went into the basement
all survival points gone
aaaand she’s running into all of these ghosts
the twins
the home invaders
the nurses
the First Guy Doctor Fellow
Peter: Um Xander?
GHOST
PRESIDENT
she got out, but it looks like XX is around
XX wrote “I love you” on a blackboard
why does their house have a blackboard?
That question may never be answered
oh god don’t take this many pills
that is likely far above the recommended dosage
a recommended dosage you DON’T HAVE
BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT YOUR PILLS
Tate is dragging her body, trying to revive her
from the pill overdose
looks like it worked
Nate is the best
Tate*
Catherine Tate: Also pretty good
Peter: Catherine Nate
“You’re doing this to yourself”
That advice to the man scared of mirrors would be much better advice if ghosts weren’t actually real here
this is probably fucking him up
if they did a film of this Ben would totally be played by Hugh Jackman
Handsome, handsome Hugh Jackman
I’m not even going to ask about the logic there
HAHAHA
The woman who fainted at Vivien’s ultrasound has become a nun out of fear of it
“You have satan in your womb”
Damn.
That is news that new mothers rarely want to hear
Like, 1 out of 1000 times.
Tops.
Oh shit
mirror guy
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
please don’t die
OH WHAT DID I JUST FUCKING SAY
IT WAS FUCKING ROBBERS
FUUUUUCKSAKE
FUCKSAKE
FUCK
SAKE
HE WASN’T CALLING YOU A PIGGY
GOD DAMN
I’m laughing so fucking hard at that
christ
You get an inordinate amount of joy from seeing people die. 😛
(But yeah that is truly an awesome bit)
Oh hey, Addy is chatting to Constance through a medium
This must be weird for Constance, whose other child (that we know of) is just sort of around
they chill some days
other days he turns into a goblin
Ugh
Mediums
Another atheist objection that’s totally reasonable in the real world, but doesn’t really work in a universe where ghosts are real
Constance would totally be played by Sally Field
just because of her Forrest Gump performance
ooo!
Who could Tom Hanks play?
Batman
Medium is crying
What’s this?
What’s happening?
There about to be some shit revealed?
“She’s grateful for not getting to the lawn with Tate”
Addy: Understandably pissed at all of Tate’s murders
Tate, pulling a gun in front of all those swat was a shitty move
in fact
it’s what got you killed
christ Tate
think it through
Violet has one of Tate’s schoolbooks
I had the schoolbook of a friend in the grade above me
his math one
that was good times
He didn’t shoot up ANY shools
schools
what is wrong with you Xander?
Your spelling today.
What was it earlier?
Neigher?
Oh man
You’re so dumb Xander
Maybe it’s time for someone to have some sleep
(by someone I mean you)
menawhile, Tate has confessed his love for Violet
“Menawhile” jesus christ
Yeah okay might sleep after this episode
Violet, don’t spoon with the murdering ghost
it doesn’t work out in the end
he’s a ghost
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