Lost, Season 3: Episodes 22-23

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In 2009, Peter watched through the first five seasons of Lost for the first time, live-tweeting all thoughts as he had them. Nicknames were created, awards were invented and dispensed, and predictions were made. If you’ve never seen Lost (or even if it’s been a while), these may not make much sense.
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Lost
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[[Episode 22]]
Peter:
So, currently my biggest question is what reveal the season will end on.
Peter:
Top contenders at the moment are Jacob or the off-shore boat.
Peter:
My Jacob theories are that he’s either
Peter:
a) the spirit of the Island, or
Peter:
b) Jack’s Dad.
Peter:
Either way, he could well be dead.
Peter:
I just came up with a theory then:
Peter:
Locke, in death, gets incorporated into Jacob’s spirit.
Peter:
That would actually be mighty cool.
Peter:
Without further ado, Through the Looking Glass part 1, ep 22.
Peter:
Previously on Lost is all about the underwater station.
Peter:
Oh! And the “blow up the others” plan!
Peter:
The Blow Up Plan is probably what they’ll end the season on.
Peter:
All seasons have ended on explosions thus far.
Peter:
Is…is that Jack with a beard? Why does Jack have a beard?
Peter:
I assume this is a Jack flashback episode?
Peter:
To a time when he had an ugly-ass beard?
Peter:
Or some kind of weird dream or forward-flashback.
Peter:
Perhaps it’s Jack’s brother, mourning his death.
Peter:
I genuinely have no idea.
Peter:
Maybe this is one of those “loops” I’ve heard about.
Peter:
Oh yes, haven’t mentioned yet.
Peter:
Due to a twitter conversation that I was a part of, I accidentally know a couple of spoilers.
Peter:
Sawyer kills someone called Anton Cooper, and there are something called “Loops”.
Peter:
Prediction: Bearded Jack doesn’t kill himself.
Peter:
Looks like instead, he’s going to save people from a car crash.
Peter:
The “Juliet is a mole” thing was most unsatisfactorially resolved.
Peter:
Pretty sure that’s not a word.
Peter:
There should have been more conflict.
Peter:
Sayid: “I’m willing to give my life up for rescue.”
Peter:
Gosh darn you rock, Sayid.
Peter:
You’re an early contender for Most Likeable already.
Peter:
Did I already predict that the Island Mens’ super-sperm is what causes the babies to die?
Peter:
If not, I’m predicting it now.
Peter:
I’m still unclear how much the non-Jack/Kate/Sawyer Islanders know about the Others.
Peter:
What were they told?
Peter:
If I knew there was a civilisation of people who COULD get off the Island but choose not to, I’d want to know everything about them.
Peter:
Obviously I DO know about them.
Peter:
I meant if I were a castaway on the Island.
Peter:
I hope my meaning was unambiguous.
Peter:
It’s amazing how bad I am at recognising Australian accents when they’re on American shows.
Peter:
No matter how good the accent.
Peter:
I have a different frame of reference, “American” becomes my base to compare them to.
Peter:
Just then, for example, I thought Naomi was Aussie.
Peter:
Okay, so the Amphibs are definitely part of the Others.
Peter:
I love it when Benry is baffled.
Peter:
He’s all “What!?? How???”
Peter:
There’s only 10 people in this attack that they’re blowing up.
Peter:
We’ve still got no idea how many total Others there are.
Peter:
Dozens? 100s?
Peter:
This dramatic music is fantastic. Totally made my heart race.
Peter:
Oh no! Jin, you missed the dynamite! You fool!
Peter:
Jin, you’ve doomed us all!
Peter:
Now you and Sayid have been all captured!
Peter:
Whyyyy??
Peter:
Admittedly, I’m glad that Tom survived. Tom is my favourite Other.
Peter:
Is Ugly-Beard Jack meant to be him pre-doctor?
Peter:
Should he look younger?
Peter:
Okay, no. This is set post-divorce.
Peter:
Thought maybe the beard was meant to take like 20 years off. (it really doesn’t)
Peter:
It consistently takes me a second to adjust when Denise is called Sarah.
Peter:
Denise is a bitch.
Peter:
Jack: “Maybe you could give me a lift home?”
Peter:
Her: ‘Nuh-uh! You can walk, donut-breath.’
Peter:
Does Jack even eat donuts?
Peter:
(I may have slightly altered her response for comedic purposes.)
Peter:
Prediction: season ends with Charlie drowning.
Peter:
That would be a worthy death.
Peter:
I’m big on worthy deaths in TV shows/movies/books.
Peter:
WOAH.
Peter:
Benry: “Shoot Quon. (Jin)”
Peter:
Way to fricking raise the stakes, Ben!
Peter:
Now I’m…BERNARD, NO! YOU SUCK SO BAD!
Peter:
BERNARD I HATE YOU.
Peter:
TOM, SHOOT BERNARD.
Peter:
HE IS THE SUCKIEST OF ALL THE DENTISTS IN ALL THE WORLD.
Peter:
Fuck, Bernard! Why you gotta be like that?
Peter:
Oooh, in other news, Benry just mentioned a temple.
Peter:
Temple? That sounds expositiolicious!
Peter:
So the explosions happened earlier, ruling that out of things that could be the season ending.
Peter:
I’m back to Charlie’s death.
Peter:
Sawyer! We haven’t seen Sawyer for ages.
Peter:
Kate:”Tell me what happened!”
Peter:
What are they…oh, that’s right!
Peter:
You killed Locke’s Dad. Completely forgot.
Peter:
Of course you’re going to be preggers, Kate.
Peter:
Sawyer was virile even before the Island, but now with his Super-sperm?
Peter:
Bound to be.
Peter:
So far both seasons of Lost have ended with an explosion.
Peter:
I am hoping that’s a trend that continues.
Peter:
Charlie sure is bleeding a lot in this episode.
Peter:
Oh great, more bearded flashbacks.
Peter:
This had better freaking relate in some way.
Peter:
These hospital scenes are sort of making me want to watch Grey’s Anatomy again.
Peter:
Gosh that was a deliciously bad show.
Peter:
I’m nominating Jack’s beard for ugliest beard I’ve ever seen on television or in movies.
Peter:
(I have seen worse in real life)
Peter:
Sawyer’s beard, however? Damn sexy.
Peter:
Not the sexiest I’ve ever seen, but definitely right up there.
Peter:
The Jack/Juliet relationship is probably my favourite on the show at the moment.
Peter:
Maybe Charlie/Hurley as a close second.
Peter:
Hey, second Amphib girl – is that…what’s her name…Ginnifer Goodwin?
Peter:
She looks like Ginnifer Goodwin.
Peter:
Eyepatch Man has taken off his Eyepatch.
Peter:
He looks so fricking awesome.
Peter:
Perhaps…more awesome?
Peter:
No, just equally awesome.
Peter:
Ben is talking about “Listening to the Island”.
Peter:
Turns out that Locke was on the right track all along.
Peter:
Gosh I hope he’s still alive.
Peter:
Theory: The Island is strong in the Force.
Peter:
That would seriously explain like 99% of this show.
Peter:
Kate: “Why are you sticking up for Sawyer? He’d never do it for you.”
Peter:
…so? That is not how society functions. Especially Island society.
Peter:
Juliet looks a bit like a lizard at times.
Peter:
Why the hell has Hurley come back?? Just to be in the episode?
Peter:
Maybe all the main characters will turn back and the rest will be killed off.
Peter:
Poor Hurley.
Peter:
Speaking of Hurley, we haven’t had anything about Number Fever in so damned long.
Peter:
lol!!
Peter:
Alex: “You put him in a room and brainwashed him!”
Peter:
Ben: “I didn’t want him to get you pregnant. I suppose I overreacted.”
Peter:
Alex: “Why don’t you want them to leave?”
Peter:
SUCH a good question, but Ben gave such a shitty answer.
Peter:
Hey, Locke’s alive! Seems that he’s lost the use of his legs.
Peter:
He seems to do that sporadically.
Peter:
Use the Force, Locke!
Peter:
Prediction: Locke doesn’t kill himself.
Peter:
If nothing else, because TV regulations generally don’t allow suicides to be shown.
Peter:
Hey, Walt! Walt’s back! Apparition-Walt!
Peter:
Nice twist, terrible episode ender.
Peter:
This episode gets a serious, SERIOUS Flashback Fail. Possibly the most fail-ful flashbacks the show’s ever seen.
Peter:
Most likeable: Sayid can have it for being awesome.
Peter:
Least likeable: Amphib 1. (non-Ginnifer)
Peter:
Most Intriguing: Benry. He’s so darned fascinating.
Peter:
I’m swearing like a Mormon today.
Peter:
“Gosh!” “Darned!” “Flibberty-gibbits.”
Peter:
I haven’t said that last one yet, but I’ll try to in the next ep.
Peter:
[[Episode 23]]
Peter:
Okay! Season 3 Finale, “Through the Looking Glass Part 2”.
Peter:
Previously on Lost is about the explosions, showing us who is captured by the Others, Charlie’s death-prediction, and the satellite phone.
Peter:
Oh, okay.
Peter:
Flashbacks are a continuation of last episode.
Peter:
More Bearded Jack.
Peter:
If they’re great, might retract my complaints about last episode’s flashbacks.
Peter:
Crap! Had a prediction, can’t remember what it was.
Peter:
Damn it, that’s going to bug me now.
Peter:
Jack’s at a funeral.
Peter:
…Jacob’s?
Peter:
Remember the only characters who have heard the name Jacob are Locke and the Others, so Jacob could be linked to anyone.
Peter:
Jack’s taking pills.
Peter:
Who do you think you are, House?
Peter:
What??
Peter:
Danielle’s all “I’m not leaving the Island! It is my home now.”
Peter:
Your nickname is Crazy Danielle for a reason, Crazy Danielle.
Peter:
Oooh, nice.
Peter:
Benry intercepted them, wants to talk to Jack.
Peter:
Is exposition too much to hope for?
Peter:
Typically exposition is something that irritates in movies/TV.
Peter:
In Lost, I’m freaking begging for it.
Peter:
Hey housemates on the phone, do you think you could maybe talk a bit louder? I can’t not hear the TV enough yet.
Peter:
So if the station’s flooded, the equipment still works.
Peter:
There goes my end-of-season theory.
Peter:
People are getting shot all over the place here.
Peter:
Eyepatch Man was just killed.
Peter:
I’d be more concerned if it weren’t the 2nd or 3rd time.
Peter:
OH!
Peter:
Alex and Danielle are like 15 metres from each other!
Peter:
Some shit had better go DOWN here.
Peter:
Jack, you drug addict.
Peter:
Don’t you realise the drug-addicted doctor plot has already been done to death by House?
Peter:
Benry: “You’re going to kill all your people, Jack.”
Peter:
I really hope he doesn’t. That would be terrible telly.
Peter:
Oooh, extremely nice twist.
Peter:
Benry’s all “Naomi is one of the bad guys.”
Peter:
I’m inclined to believe him.
Peter:
I genuinely have no idea why I trust Benry so much.
Peter:
He’s so despicable.
Peter:
I love him.
Peter:
He may be my favourite TV bad guy ever.
Peter:
Benry: “Why do you want to leave the Island so much?”
Peter:
Jesus, what a stupi…HOLY CRAP THEY JUST SHOT JIN, SAYID AND THE DENTIST
Peter:
I mean, I’m pro shooting the dentist, but definitely not Sayid or Bernard.
Peter:
Unless, of course, they were bluffing. It’s possible.
Peter:
You know the rule of TV deaths – if we don’t see the body…in this case, we only heard the shots.
Peter:
I’m not sure if I hope they’re dead or alive.
Peter:
“Good Vibrations” is the coolest code ever.
Peter:
This show’s hitting a lot of best-ofs from me tonight.
Peter:
I must be feeling generous.
Peter:
Ha ha!
Peter:
The Danielle/Alex moment we’ve been building towards for so long.
Peter:
Awards won by tonight’s episode of Lost:
Peter:
Ugliest Beard, Best TV Villain, Coolest Code, and consideration for Sexiest Beard.
Peter:
I can’t remember what I’ve already predicted, so sorry if these are repeats. Predictions:
Peter:
-Naomi is with Desmond’s love.
Peter:
-The Others’ Temple relates (obviously) to their weird funeral rituals, and (theory) to the four-toed statue foot.
Peter:
Kate: “Why didn’t you kill Benry?”
Peter:
Because he’s just won Best TV Villain.
Peter:
Duh, Kate.
Peter:
Yeah, this is why I was hoping they were actually dead.
Peter:
Them being alive feels like a cop-out.
Peter:
HURLEY IN A VW.
Peter:
YOU ARE SO COOL HURLEY.
Peter:
I’D FORGOTTEN HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU.
Peter:
Also Sayid just broke someone’s neck with his legs.
Peter:
Fuck.
Peter:
This is a serious contender for best episode of the season.
Peter:
If only
Peter:
1) The flashbacks didn’t suck so bad, and
Peter:
2) I hadn’t already promised Best Episode to Expose. (which I do not at all regret.)
Peter:
Sawyer just killed Tom.
Peter:
Flashbacks aren’t getting any better.
Peter:
Yes, Jack was suicidal, addicted to drugs and had a shitty beard.
Peter:
So what?
Peter:
That brings Sawyers’ kill-count up to…3? 4?
Peter:
Hurley is so excited (deservedly so) about being the hero.
Peter:
He can have Most likeable.
Peter:
My money’s still on Charlie dying at the end of this episode.
Peter:
It would be like the reverse subversion of last time.
Peter:
Last time they set him up to die and he didn’t.
Peter:
This time, he’s been set up to no longer be in danger, so he’ll most likely die.
Peter:
Woo! Penelope! Things are starting to tie together.
Peter:
Meanwhile, in the Underwater Hatch, spooky things are starting to happen.
Peter:
Do grenades work underwater?
Peter:
I am suspicious of grenades working underwater.
Peter:
I guess there might be special underwater grenades but these do not seem like them.
Peter:
Charlie’s looking like he’s going to die.
Peter:
If I were him, I’d swim out the explosion-hole and up to the surface.
Peter:
Instead, he’s being all self-sacrificing and writing messages on his hand.
Peter:
I suppose that’s cooler.
Peter:
I mean, I’d rather Charlie lived, but you can’t set up his death like they did (the flash-forwards) and then not have him actually die.
Peter:
At last, we see the radio tower!
Peter:
This was set up right at the beginning of season 1.
Peter:
Cleverly layered show, Lost is.
Peter:
They’re typing into the phone.
Peter:
I really hope this causes something to explode.
Peter:
Locke just killed someone with a knife!
Peter:
Locke should kill more people with knives.
Peter:
At least once per episode.
Peter:
At this point, if I were Jack, I wouldn’t trust Locke either.
Peter:
He keeps blowing things up when he shouldn’t.
Peter:
Dramatic structure requires that Jack answer Chekhov’s phone.
Peter:
And…yup, Locke just put the gun down.
Peter:
Yeah, hate to break your bubbles guys, but you’re not getting rescued.
Peter:
This is season 3 of 6.
Peter:
You’ll be on the Island for a while yet.
Peter:
This episode has done NOTHING to convince me that both it and the previous ep don’t have the absolute worst flashbacks on the show so far.
Peter:
I need to go to the loo so bad but things keep happening.
Peter:
Damn you Lost, why you gotta be so watchable?
Peter:
Thank-you, Bearded Jack Flashback.
Peter:
You came just at the right time.
Peter:
Okay, urination complete, resuming episode play.
Peter:
Jack is meeting someone.
Peter:
If that someone isn’t like…called Jacob, or some equally cool dramatic plot twist…
Peter:
…I assume that’s not Kate.
Peter:
She looks a lot like Kate.
Peter:
Like Kate without freckles.
Peter:
What the crap?
Peter:
I genuinely have no idea what’s happening here.
Peter:
Is this them off the Island?
Peter:
In the future?
Peter:
Or clones, or alternative reality, or what?
Peter:
So, Housemates, feeling loud tonight are you? I have had to rewind and increase volume of this bit twice now.
Peter:
The “Golden Pass” implies that this is set after they get back on the main land.
Peter:
This is thoroughly confusing me.
Peter:
He just called her “Kitty”. I suppose that could be a diminuitive of “Kate”
Peter:
…Jack: “We made a mistake.”
Peter:
“We were not supposed to leave.”
Peter:
Fuck you, ambiguous dialogue!
Peter:
You are annoying…he called her Kate!
Peter:
Okay, it’s Kate.
Peter:
So this episode’s flashback sort of redeemed itself, but not enough to make up for how frustrating it was.
Peter:
That’s how you want to finish the season?
Peter:
THAT is your season ender?
Peter:
Lost, you do a lot of things well, but ending seasons is NOT one of them.
Peter:
Right, well, guess I’d better give out some awards.
Peter:
Most Likeable: Hurley.
Peter:
Least Likeable: Jack, for your shitty shitty flashbacks.
Peter:
Most Intriguing: Locke? Apparition Walt? Naomi? I’ll give it to Benry, just for consistency.
Peter:
Deaths: Charlie, Tom, Naomi, 2 other Others.
Peter:
Wait, no. 4 other Others.
Peter:
Also, Eyepatch Man gets mad props for escaping death for the 2nd or 3rd time. Go Eyepatch Man!
Peter:
Hopefully by the time I finish season 4, season 5 is out, because I seriously hate Lost’s season finales.
Peter:
Irritatingly unsatisfying.
Peter:
You could argue that they’re successful because they leave you wanting more, but no, they leave you with a bad taste in your mouth.
Peter:
[[A few hours later:]]
Peter:
I have got to remember to always break between seasons.
Peter:
The finales sit so much better with me after time to consider.
Peter:
Things we learned from Jack’s future-flashbacks:
Peter:
-They get off the Island (obvious)
Peter:
-He grows a beard (ugly).
Peter:
Let’s dig deeper.
Peter:
-Jack’s Dad seems to still be alive. He references him twice. There’s a LOT to think about right there. Did he fake his death?
Peter:
Someone made reference to him being a hero “twice”. That makes a lot more sense now. I already guessed “Golden Pass”, of course.
Peter:
Kate (now nicknamed “Kitty”?) made a reference to “him”.
Peter:
I like to think she was living with Sawyer. Maybe not though. Also: whose funeral?
Peter:
Lost is extremely good at having so much going on that you miss asking obvious questions. eg: Why did Jacob want Locke’s help??
Peter:
Also: WHY was Penny on the other end of that communications line? Didn’t even think about it at the time, but that makes NO sense!
Peter:
Okay, predictions for next season:
Peter:
-We start with everyone off the Island and see their return through flashbacks.
Peter:
(their return to the mainland, not their return to the Island.)
Peter:
Of course, is also possible that…hang on, this one’s hard to explain.
Peter:
Two parallel timelines, running at once, instead of flashbacks. One where they get rescued, one where they don’t. That’d be cool.
Peter:
It’s hard to effectively explain in text, but that’d be interesting and something only Lost could do.
Peter:
Well not ONLY Lost, but Lost is the only TV show I can imagine trying to tackle it. It’s unlikely, but I’m optimistic.
Peter:
Theory:
Peter:
-Penelope was a financier for the Dharma Initiative. That would explain her trying to find the Island + her being on the line.
Peter:
I can’t really theorise much else, I wasn’t given a lot to work with last episode.
Peter:
I remember thinking but don’t know if I predicted (unfortunately) that it would be cool if they DID get rescued and we dealt with that.
Peter:
That’s right! It was when Michael got off the Island. I mentioned that it would be cool if we followed them, back in the real world.
Peter:
Woah! JUST remembered – was tweeting at the time so couldn’t comment, but didn’t Jack profess his love for Kate in that last ep?
Peter:
[[Running Tally: All seasons ]]
Peter:
Most likeable: Saywer on 13 (Hurley on 9, Jack, Charlie, and Sayid on 6, Jin on 4, Turnip-head Ulrich, Sun, Tom and Desmond on 2, 7 characters on 1 – Shannon, Walt, Jin, Boom, Kate, Random shop-woman, Paulo/Dirk/Berto)
Peter:
Least likeable: Benry on 9 (Jin and Jack on 5, Anna, Michael, Locke and Kate on 4, Jack’s Dad, Shannon, Crazy Danielle, and Charlie on 2, 9 on 1 – Locke’s Dad, Sawyer, Claire, Tom, Bernard, Denise, Juliet, Desmond’s Love’s Dad, Sun)
Peter:
Most intriguing: Juliet on 7 (Locke on 6, Eko and Benry on 5, Kate, Walt, and Desmond on 4, Ethan, and Crazy Danielle on 3, Anna, Sawyer, Michael, Sun, Eyepatch Man and Richard/Patrick on 2, 13 characters on 1 – Sayid, Jack, Charlie, Boom, Shannon, Denise, Goodwin, Tom, Libby, Alex, Hurley’s Dad)
Peter:
[[Current season]]
Peter:
Most likeable: Sawyer on 8 (Jack, Charlie, Sayid and Hurley on 2, Tom, Random Shop-woman, Desmond, and Jin on 1)
Peter:
Least likeable: Benry on 5 (Kate on 3, Jack on 2, Denise, Juliet, Danny, Desmond’s Love’s Dad, Locke and Sun all on 1)
Peter:
Most intriguing: Juliet on 7 (Locke, Desmond, Eyepatch Man, Benry and Richard/Patrick on 2, Eko, Mal, Alex, and Hurley’s Dad on 1)
Peter:
[[Awards presented: ]]
Locke:
“The Locke Award” (previously on 7 “Most likeables”)
Eko:
“The Locke Award” (awarded before he even won any “Most likeables”)
Peter:
So it seems that this season, Sawyer was overwhelmingly likeable, Juliet was overwhelmingly intriguing, and Benry was generally quite dislikeable.
Peter:
Sawyer really did rock this season.