The Casper movie is on YouTube in its entirety.
Looks like I know how I’m spending the next 99 minutes!
Hey cool Ben Stein! He’s a lawyer in this. Reading a will.
Hahaha. All the money was left “to the dyslexic Dalmatian foundation…”
Eric Idle is one of the like 2 things I remember about this film.
Oh my god this movie has a buried gold plot??
I don’t know who this woman is, but she’s annoyingly stupid.
I mean I know she’s the bad guy but beyond that…
Things I remember about this film:
-Casper is a ghost
-There’s some kind of secret passage rollercoaster like in the Emperor’s New Groove
-There’s some kind of machine that can turn ghosts into humans but ONLY ONE (for some reason) and Casper’s Dad gets brought back? Or the main girl’s Dad? Someone gets brought back instead of Casper
-When they become a ghost they forget…something. I remember the Dad (I don’t know whose Dad) dies and forgets his daughter.Okay presumably the daughter’s Dad.
-Casper has three mean older sibling ghosts
Haha Casper just did a face-palm. Adorable.
Oh man Exorcism Montage!
I love exorcism montages
Google tells me this moustachio’d exorcist is a comedy character from something.
And now they have Dan Akroyd!
They were all over the cameos.
I mean honestly bad-guy lady, I would call the news and become internationally famous for proof of ghosts, but knocking down the house works too I guess.
We’re a full 10 minutes in and haven’t yet met the protagonist. Interesting.
(Assuming the girl is the protagonist and not Casper. We’ve met Casper.)
Oh so Casper is telling the bad-guy woman about the ghost-psychologist man, rather than just going straight to the ghost-psychologist man’s daughter.
I love the idea that a piece on the ghost psychologist would go into this level of detail about the daughter.
Oh Christina Ricci. You are tops.
Introduced around the 15-minute mark!
Trying to work out the level of ghost-acceptance in this world.
Ricci goes straight from “You’re not going to find Mom!” to “Ghosts aren’t real”, which I suppose could both be considered the same thing, but the felt more like a “Even though you’re always interacting with ghosts, Mom won’t be the first.”
Casper opened at #1. In my mind it’s a cult hit for some reason, but nope: it was a normal standard hit.
Oh my god these people are terrifying
Why would they grab the psychiatrist’s daughter’s face like that?
Why would her Dad be okay with them doing that?
Eric Idle I think I preferred you as the drunk in Dudley Doo-Right
Here you’re just sort of put-upon and sort of evil but not particularly interesting
Oh boy Casper got a cru-ush
Hahaha “Gimme four! Oh god I’d kill for a pinkie…”
I have no idea why Christina Ricci knows how to fix a generator but apparently she does.
She sassy, too.
“Stretch, Fatso and Stinkie…man they had cool parents. I wonder where Doc and Dopey sleep.” Gold.
This movie is funnier than I remember.
I have these distinct memories of the sequel being so, so awful, but I don’t even remember why.
More memories coming back:
-I think the evil ghosts pretend to be the ghost of the Mom at some point?
But also at the end they get to meet her ghost for real?
For some reason?
Just remembered the most recent thing I saw Christina Ricci in – Speed Racer!
She’s cool in that.
Do people really faint in shock? It happens a lot in movies, not sure if it’s a real thing.
I know goats do.
“Dad I saw a ghost and it was real and I saw a real ghost!”
“Honey, what are you saying?”
I feel like she could hardly have been more clear…
Bill Pullman you are being a dick. “No ghosts here…no ghosts here…”
Patronising and a dick.
Oh hey Brad Garrett is one of the evil ghost voices!
Pre-Raymond, I think
So is the idea that these four ghosts are the first time humans have interacted with ghosts?
The premise is not particularly well-explored.
I’m just saying, I’d like this ghost film for kids to expand more on the world they’ve created.
Oh my god there were just three consecutive celebrity cameos…Clint Eastwood, Mel Gibson, and I didn’t actually recognise the middle one.
Oh, it’s Rodney Dangerfield! How’d they manage those?
The director must know some people.
I’m genuinely fascinated by the rules of ghosts in this film/how much interaction they’ve had with humans until now.
“What are you made of?”
“You know that tingly feeling when your foot falls asleep? I think I’m made of that.”
Well that cleared things up!
Oh hey now there’s breakfast machines! This film really has all the cool fun stuff, doesn’t it?
“Can you hurt me?”
Is that like a…rule? Or does he just not want to?
Because the other ghosts were brandishing swords and seemed pretty dangerous.
Is the rule “Sure you can move stuff around but if you hurt someone you lose your ghost privileges” or something like that?
How does he know he can’t hurt her?
Has he tried before?
I CRAVE MORE DATA
Oh no! Evil ghosts are back!
I’m surprised by how much I’m enjoying this film.
Also how little I remember
A weird “Oprah is fat” joke. Not sure where that came from.
Did that ghost just turn into a Nike-branded shoe? Best product placement ever.
Oh man this film is now 19 years old
I wonder if “attractive and non-threatening teen male with controlling girlfriend” is a trope. I feel like I’ve seen it around a lot.
Mean Girls is the obvious example, but I’m sure there are more.
Gives the main girl someone to want, and a clear obstacle in her path.
Amber: “As you all know, my parents have finished the new boat house, so I’m sure it’d be no problem to have it at my place.”
Everyone else in class: *reluctant clapping*
Yeah, that bitch. Offering a solution to the problem with the dance.
Teacher: Everyone welcome Katherine Harvey.
Amber: (mockingly) “Harvey”
Everyone else in class: *laughs*
I mean make up your mind. Do they like Amber (which is why they laugh at her weak jokes) or dislike her?
Harvey isn’t even a weird name!
Like, in the slightest.
“Harvey”. Such sneer.
Kid in class: “Let’s have the party at Kat’s place!”
Teacher: “Yeah that sounds good”
Kat: *is never asked at all*
Casper just pulled Christina Ricci out a window as she repeatedly screamed “no” and did everything she could to resist.
Cut to: “Casper this is beautiful”.
I know this might sound like I’m harping on, but that’s rape culture.
“Close the window…it’s so cold in here.”
Holy heck I have no idea why but THAT line stuck in my head!
Oh wow yeah the bad guys we spent 15 minutes on at the start of the film
I actually forgot they existed
Oh fuck ROOM OF TOYS
This movie has ALL THE COOLEST STUFF
I can totally see why I loved this as a kid
My god that is an ugly dress
I hate to tell you this Casper but your Mom had awful taste in clothing
“What’s it like to die” is a pretty deep freaking question for a kid’s film
“Like being born…only backwards.”
Casper that is not a useful answer.
“Prominent inventor declared legally insane” is actually a super sad headline.
“Insists he’s haunted by his dead son”
Oh yeah rollercoaster-esque ride on a chair!
Fuck this film contains some cool shit.
This “morning routine” machine is so stupidly useless.
It brushes your front teeth only, for about 6 seconds.
It tries to shave you by having three blades waggle near your face for a few seconds.
I mean clearly the guy was a genius but this is far from his finest work.
Also that is a ludicrous amount of shaving cream
I keep thinking “the vault” is going to have family keepsakes, but that’s Richie Rich.
Oh my god I need to watch Richie Rich again.
That also has Ben Stein!
Oh and the Butler! He was so cool.
Also Mr Rich was played by that guy who’s in everything.
I don’t think that film had contraptions like this one does, but it had go-karts and roller-coasters.
That’s right bad guys, keep on pulling the handle of the safe.
That’s the only thing stopping you from getting into the safe.
Not enough pulling.
They’re not going to go into any explanation about what’s in the “primordial soup mix”, are they?
It seems like a pretty major step forward for humanity, scientifically speaking.
Although this is a movie where ghosts are real, so trying to approach it from a scientific point of view fails pretty quickly.
MORE DATA REQUIRED
Mr Inventor why do the levers on the Lazarus (only just got the name btw) control the chair roller-coaster?
You did not think this through.
Eric Idle’s clothes were cut up by the razors.
Casper’s Dad REALLY sucked at shaving.
Oh god really bad guys? You find the ability to bring people back to life and you want to use it to KILL YOURSELF, BECOME A GHOST, AND GET INTO THE VAULT??
I haven’t seen such a stupid waste of supernatural abilities since About Time
Haha the bad guy lady’s death scene was pretty funny
Eric Idle: “Carrigan!! Are you a ghost yet??”
Carrigan: “The bitch is back.”
Also if becoming a ghost is THIS easy, why are there not ghosts all over the freaking shop?
Bill Pullman should have been meeting a ghost every few minutes, instead of these (now 5) ghosts being the first ones ever encountered.
Oh that’s right the evil ghosts were getting Pullman drunk
Don’t know why, but sure.
God they’re casual about killing people in this flick!
Now the ghosts are killing Pullman
Not sure if you’re aware, but killing people is a pretty evil act
Really not into this casual “people killing/dying” plot.
On the other hand, really solid “Possession is 9/10ths of the law” pun just happened.
And now Bill Pullman is dead.
As soon as we learned you can bring ONE person back to life, two people died.
Why are the people at this bar just totally fine with the three ghosts being there?
Also why is there a 200-foot drop immediately out the door of the pub, with no fencing or anything?
This world really is very poorly-explored.
Ugh ghost Carrigan is awful. She’s all hair and makeup and clothes and eyeliner.
The other ghosts have all been blobby; she’s just the actor but in 3D form.
Also: unlike the Dad, she didn’t seem to lose any memories by being ghostified.
This film got really weak really fast.
We’re pretty heartily heading into the third act here.
This film has a whole bunch of antagonists:
-Carrigan and Dibs
-The three evil ghosts
-The mean girl from school
Although the longer the movie goes, the less sure I am that the evil ghosts are evil
I mean they did just kill a guy
But I guess “death” doesn’t mean as much in a world where it literally doesn’t stop you from being around
Carrigan just called Dibs a “Flaccid little worm”
I enjoyed that.
Man they’re all over “bitch” in this film
Dibs: “I’m going to have a little puppy, called Carrigan. A bitch, just like you!”
Also Carrigan just killed Dibs.
Ghosts sure are killing a bunch of people in this film.
When Casper said he couldn’t hurt her, maybe he meant that it was against his personal code
Rather than a rule of ghosts
Casper’s treasure was…a baseball! Gasp!
Looks like they used the same plot for Richie Rich and this both.
What on earth is Casper’s unfinished business? They never really go into it.
“Dad! No! What’ve you done to him?”
They, uh, they killed him. Figured that was pretty obvious.
Bill Pullman’s ghost also has hair and clothes.
I can only assume Casper and the other three ghosts were naked and bald, all the time.
Christina Ricci, time to ACT!
Do your ACTING now!
Oh she is acting up a storm!
Casper: “Come on Doctor Harvey: you need this more than I do.”
Ugh who wrote this scene
Hang on why didn’t Casper’s Dad ever actually use the machine on his son?
That is, after all, why he created it…did he get locked up sometime between finishing the (clearly fully-functional) machine and actually getting to use it on his ever-present son?
Like “Ha ha ha! I have finally put the last touch on my machine. Now, Casper, come here…oh dang! What are the odds the police would turn up at this very second.”
Maybe he wanted to celebrate one final day of not-being-a-dad and went out and got drunk and punched a cop
Or maybe the evil ghosts screwed with him for the purposes of evil.
Who were they in life, anyway?
What’s their relationship to Casper/the house??
SO MANY QUESTIONS
Ah yes, time for the party. The party they put like a minute into setting up.
Such HIGH STAKES
This film has really put me off!
Bill Pullman: “Go on, go do your thing.”
Christina Ricci: “But what about you?”
Bill Pullman: “This is your party.”
As an adult that line has a whole different meaning.
As a kid, I thought he was being all “This is your party, sweetie”.
Now I see he meant “Why the fuck would I want to go to a party with a bunch of teenagers? I literally cannot imagine a worse experience if I tried very very hard.”
“And I literally JUST DIED.”
Haha that Amber sure got her just desserts for trying to ruin the party!
What a poorly-written villain.
This film’s third act: two thumbs down.
Ha! The whole party started applauding Amber’s fate (/r/thathappened) and then turned to Christina Ricci in admiration, like she had *anything* to do with it.
Hang on wouldn’t Casper’s Dad have very, very clear unfinished business?
The whole “dead son, ghost-to-life machine”?
Maybe Fatso is Casper’s Dad.
And has just forgotten his unfinished business.
Oh Jesus Christ now just to add to the poor ending they’ve introduced a deus ex machina
Christina Ricci’s dead mom is apparently an angel who can give Casper two hours of life
I thought they were setting Ricci up with Amber’s trod-upon boyfriend, but apparently not
Why did that character even exist?
Casper: ‘I’m gonna get laaaiiiid.’
Christina Ricci: ‘Um I dunno…’
Casper: ‘For real? I’m alive for TWO HOURS. You’re going to deny me getting my dick wet?’
Christina Ricci: ‘You’re TWELVE.’
Casper: ‘Yeah but I’ve been twelve for like a hundred years now. Believe me, I learned how it all works.’
Christina: ‘How old are you?’
Christina: ‘Yes…but how long have you been twelve?’
(None of the above actually happens in the film. At no point does Casper actually talk about getting his dick wet.)
This, however, was a for-real line:
Casper: “Can I keep you?”
No! You’re dead. Also, twelve! Also, people aren’t property!
Bill Pullman, now it is your turn to ACT
Dead wife: “it’s alright…it’s just me.”
Yeah, but “just me” is his DEAD WIFE. Dead wife!
This movie scores like a 9/10 on cool concepts, and a 3/10 on emotional weight/cohesive plotting.
Holy crap Casper just went in for the kiss
I feel like my experience as a 12-year old was very different to this
I mean I guess I wasn’t a ghost but still
Inexplicable dance sequence with evil ghosts on instruments woo!
They clearly had NO idea how to end this film and just went “Fuck it! Casper song!”
Final verdict: 4.5/10? Maybe up to like 6, depending on how little you care about plot.
Biggest issues: the over-the-top antagonists who appear and disappear at inexplicable times, and the lack of emotional focus.
Biggest strength: cool shit throughout.
I’m going to go with 5.5/10, just because it IS worth watching, but that’s me being generous.