I seem to have acquired cupcakes, that means it is time for GoT, right?
Papa Stark is suspicious of someone’s fancy armour. And also their death.
Robert, don’t take your inability to fit in your armour out on the poor kid
Stop picking on your servant people!
“Because I’m king? Piss on that, I want to hit someone!”
So much class
What a guy
“Come, bow before your king. Now, you shits.”
Arya’s dancing lessons! Yay!
THAT GUY JUST CUT HIS HORSE’S HEAD OFF
THIS IS NOT A PROPORTIONAL REACTION TO LOSING AT JOUSTING
Favourite part of that jousting match: Sansa getting a rose.
Least favourite: HORSE’S HEAD BEING CUT OFF
Tyrion is the best at being captured
Good lord this is a violent show
TYRION JUST STABBED SOMEONE TO DEATH USING A SHIELD
“Your first? You need a woman”
Damn Bran, being pushed out a window changed you
THOSE ARE FRONT BITS
TV CAN’T SHOW FRONT BITS
DID YOU JUST SEE A DICK??
HBO can and will
AND A LADY PART
“I don’t want to pay for it.”
“Then get yourself a wife.”
You tell him, prostitute-I-suspect-is-Ros
I could make a fortune selling poison as clear as water and with no taste
Admittedly, I would not be able to stay in one place long
Arya, you are not Indiana Jones, do not go down mysterious passageways, it will not end well
Yeah, Ayra, those were some traitors.
Stark kids: stop witnessing compromising scenes
It has not worked out well for you thus far
This guy apparently runs the best and most comprehensive brothel
“I’ve heard you cater for a lord with a taste for cadavers, that must be tricky.”
I love comprehensive as a word in this context
Something for everyone
Haha, two characters with extensive knowledge of everything having a thinly veiled hinting-at-blackmail off
Hehe, nice parting shot, “hadn’t you heard?”
Varys and Baelish?
In-love-with-Detective-Stark and Makes-me-think-of-Friar-Tuck-from-the-Disney-Robin-Hood
I would watch that spinoff
That is a more convenient name to type
Haha! Ayra is being mistaken for a male beggar boy
*male not needed
“What were you doing in the dungeons?”
*shifty eyes* “chasing a cat”
“The eyrie, they say it’s impregnable”
“Give me ten good men and some climbing spikes, I’ll impregnate the bitch”
“I like you”
I like these guys
Robert! Don’t kill Dany!
Papa Stark, stop him!
“Honour? I have seven kingdoms to rule!”
IT IS NOT A KINDNESS TO KILL DANY
“When you find yourself in bed with an ugly women, you close your eyes and get on with it. Cut her throat.”
Having a brothel keeper as an advisor would be weird
Go Papa Stark!
Papa Stark is the best
He’s like Papa Smurf’s awesome cousin
The spider: Varys
Brothel owner in love with Detective Stark: Baelish?
Detective Stark’s sister seems a bit strange
Yes, to all three
Haha, “did I kill him too? I’ve been a very busy man”
Tyrion is the best
That’s kind of clever – the dungeons don’t have a fourth wall, just a sheer cliff face
And a slightly sloped floor
More sloped in the books, gave me the heebies
…why is that guy shaving the other guy?
Because they love each other
And yet he has a beard
“If you’re to become king”… new players for the crown! Fun!
I wish I could shave my armpits that smoothly…
Clearly you need a Loras
I will invest in one immediately
…maybe not, he just cut the guy
Probably kissed it better
Is that what he is doing? He seems to have missed, the cut was a bit higher than where he seems to be smooching…
Off-screen slurpy blowjobs, subtle HBO
“Which is a bigger number, 5 or 1?”
TRICK QUESTION THE ANSWER IS AN ARMY
“Sometimes I don’t know what holds the realm together”
*straight faced* “Our marriage”
I can see why their marriage works, you know
Haha I do kinda love their cynical duo
Surprisingly well suited
“I felt something for you once”
damn you guys are depressing
Go back to laughing
Ah young girl, I’m afraid the king is not going to admit to that kid being your son
“Brothels make a much better investment than ships, I’ve found. Whores rarely sink”
more sage advice from Baelish
Haha, Dury got distracted by the bosoms
I bet he thinks this investigation of bastard children born in brothels is the best
Jaimie has come looking for Tyrion!
Damn, they don’t mess around with the killing
Your old man says kill the peeps, you kill the peeps quick
Well that would hurt
Meanwhile, I think I need to bring my sword fighting skills up to scratch
Or work harder on my sure my wife doesn’t kidnap any dwarves she suspects of killing our son
To the next episode!
“Catelyn will release Tyrion and Ned will make peace with Jaimie”
Robert just sounds like an exasperated parent
Queenie is sometimes the worst – I hate her need to make up lies to paint her family as perfect-but-hard-done-by
Robert is not interested in this petty infighting
“I never loved my brothers… You were the brother I chose”
“Killing things clears my head”
Hee, he wants Papa Stark as his hand again
Dany! Did we not see you at all last episode?
I really hope that dragon egg hatches
That would be the best
Also your servant girl would be down with that
Ugh, Bran, you can’t walk
Stop dreaming you can
and seeing three eyed crows
One day you will see a real three eyed raven and be severely disappointed
Hee! Look at him ride!
Possibly-Theon, you are awfully invested in Robb serving his house properly
Bran, don’t just ride off
Why so much stabbing, guys?
Robb, don’t be cranky with Theon
DON’T ROLL OVER TYRION
“I’m prepared to give you lots of gold!”
*guy searches Tyrion*
“Well I don’t have it here!”
Oh, I liked Dury
Just one of Papa Stark’s guardsmen
Man I remember him
“When you are dancing in the meadow with dolls and flowers, this is not when fighting happens”
Xander: I may have been doing something wrong
“Do you pray to the gods?”
“The old and the new”
That seems wise, Ayra
Hedge your bets
Dany is eating something icky
Damn that is gross
Dany you are the best
Mr Dany is pleased, Viserys is not
Viserys, do not steal the dragon eggs
Oh Viserys, it is hard to rule when you have neither wealth, nor fear nor love, and you realise it
“Sometimes possession is an abstract concept”
Tyrion, that may not be the best tact to take with your jailer
“Sky cells always break”
I can easily believe this fact
“I flogged my eel into the turtle stew”
Dude, that kid is twisted
THIS IS NOT A GOOD SYSTEM FOR JUSTICE
Robin the creepiest of creepy motherfuckers
HE WAS SUCKLING HIS MOTHER’S BREAST FOR SUSTENANCE, DO NOT SUGGEST OTHERWISE
Oh man, double meaning and a half
I don’t think that is a thing, but please god yes let’s not dwell on it
“Making the eight”
Anne: What’s that?
Sleeping with one girl from each of the seven kingdoms
And one from somewhere else
Anne: Oh right!
Why did you just dump a bag of fish in the throne room, Mr Farmer?
Listening to grievances would be the worst job
“Do the Lanisters have any reason to be upset with your wife?”
Yes, I think they just might…
Papa Stark, it was just a bag o’ fish
You don’t need to deknight and kill a guy
I’m not sure Robert was expecting this when he left Papa Stark in charge
That’s one scary hole
I guess before TV was invented, justice was where the peeps got their kicks
Justice and big ol’ holes
Sword fighting seems rather dangerous
And doing it in front of a hole is not helping
I think this show needs to have it’s blood budget cut
“You don’t fight with honour.”
*looks down hole*
A Lannister always pays his debts is a cool thing to be able to claim
I might start one for me
“Elizabeth always accepts chocolate”
“Please do not show Elizabeth your front parts”
“Black no sugar thanks”
“Oh, I just realised: I don’t care”
oh Sansa, you are going to be so good for Joffrey
Haha, give the girl a necklace and some sweet words and she is all yours
Joffrey, you are so in with Sansa
Pretty-sure-you-are-Theon is so upset to see possibly-Ros go
Woah, she is wearing nothing under that dress
And was more than happy to flash for some coin
What a tart!
“I’m meant to marry Joffrey and be his wife and have his baby”
Ayra, I love you
Papa stark seems surprised to discover Joffrey is blonde
VISERYS CUTTING OUT THE BABY AND LEAVING IT FOR HIM IS NOT A SENSIBLE PLAN
Woah, someone broke his arm
Woah, is Viserys dead?!!?!?
I LIKED HIM
DON’T END THE EPISODE THERE
NO ONE ELSE LIKED HIM
HE WAS FUN
He was also a proper villain
‘GOOD TIMES VISERYS’ WE USED TO CALL HIM
Although as you say, mild and impotent in comparison
I am intrigued by ‘fire cannot kill a dragon’ in the context of Dany not getting burned by the hot dragon eggs that burned her servant girl
(What is her name?)
Haha I have no idea
Ugh, I shouldn’t stay up and watch more, I don’t want to throw my sleeping schedule out
But if I keep going they might bring back Viserys
He died pretty thoroughly dude
*sigh* you crusher of dreams
*secretly clings on to hope*
*whispers to self* Bran lived
That’s so sweet
200 missed messages
I’m disappointed it isn’t 400.
I am still perplexed by your love of Viserys
Do you not remember the horse to sister coitus remarks?
Imma miss him