[[Episode 7]]
Time to see if Viserys lives!
Ugh, stop gutting that deer, I am eating
Although I am enjoying how you are happy to point out how Jaimie is stupid, new character
Skinning a deer is gross
I love that scene
All hail Charles Dance
Ohh, Jaime fathered Joffrey hence why him being blonde was significant to previous hand
Yes yes
Now you’re catching on!
Also: sharing a womb does not mean sleeping together as adults is cool
Even if the Targareans did it first
I’m impressed at how you have never spelt Targaryian the same way twice
I don’t think I have either
Haha, Baelish, you have the weirdest job
“What we don’t know is usually what gets us killed”
I feel this is only true in a small minority of cases
Although I guess they didn’t have X-ray machines
Or whatever you use to detect cancer and heart problems
C-ray machines?
It is almost definitely C-ray machines
Haha, “I thought she was our prisoner, not our guest.”
“Are the two any different in your experience?”
BURN, THEON
So Robert appears gravely injured
Dude, looks like Papa Stark might get to be king for a bit
King Stark you say?
Robert, I would have thought some witnesses might have been a good idea
Speaking as your lawyer, that is
Hang on, is Baelish Robert’s little brother?
no
Okay, they just seemed to suggest so
His brother is Loras’ lover
The king’s brother is Loras’s lover
Not Baelish’s brother
Is his brother on the council?
Wait, his brother was being shaved?!
Yes, Prince Renly
Right
I see
Baelish is an only child as far as I know
Dude, send more birds
Dany doesn’t need to be killed
She needs to be filled!
With wine!
I suspect that wine is poison
Thank goodness for slaver friend
I retract my earlier comments.
Hehe, Sam, you are such a sweetie
Is slaver friend Jorah Mormont?
Dany’s slaver friend
Rugged older man?
That’s the chap
Jorah Mormant
I like how the wall watch people are considerate of people’s religion
Jon to the stewards? Whaaaat
(Did Sam get steward also?)
(There was a lot of names)
I think so yeah
He’s Samwell Tarly if that helps
Right right
One-eyed-Joe sounds pretty cool
Pip just told Jon about his role
And now Sam is giving him a pep talk
Sam and Pepper
Pepper? Not pip?
It is Pip
But Salt, not Sam?
No, Sam
Part of me wants to enable Xander’s jokes but most of me know you will just be SO confused later
Haha
You are such a beginner at watching shows, Anne
“I always wanted to be a ranger”
“I always wanted to be a wizard”
Both good career choices I understand
Reny seems cool
I would vote for him as king
I’m still not totally sure if Robert is actually going to die
He is actually going to fly though
Once Da Vinci joins the show, everyone gets a flying machine
I totally need to get a wax seal
“What you suggest is treason”
“Only if we lose”
I always wondered how treason works.
“We only make peace with our enemies, that’s why it is called making peace”
Baelish continues to be cool
Why don’t we carry around fire sticks?
You don’t?
geez lady
I am so embarrassed right now
That tree appears to be crying
I think the crying trees are the symbol of The Old Gods
Or they are just sad!
Puppy!
EWW
BAD PUPPY
DO NOT BRING SEVERED HANDS
WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THESE, PUPPY?
I ALREADY HAVE HANDS
I HAVE NO ROOM FOR MORE HANDS
Mr Dany seems pretty taken with Dany
Tiger-Annes!
Tiger-Annes?
Tiger-Annes: Dany and Viserys (RIP)
This inspirational speech was better before the raping of women and taking children as slaves
So that dude seems to be naked and dragged behind the horse lords
We must all pay penance to our hooven masters
ROBERT DIED
That answers that question
So Joffrey appears to be king
And Ceirsai (Queenie face) has a pretty rockin’ hairstyle going on
Joffrey being king does not mean he is married to the aptly named Queenie-face though
Despite what the show might suggest about familial relationships
Ugh, told you you should have make that declaration in front of people
And stop stabbing people!
Baelish had better be all betraying ’cause he loves Detective Stark, otherwise I am confused by his motives
EPISODE END
Next episode?
OKAY
yay!
I have also fetched my book which has an appendix for the different houses
I MAY FINALLY SPELL SOMETHING CORRECTLY
[[Episode 8]]
I don’t know why seeing “king’s land” on a map amused me so
I am literally sitting here in Queensland
It’s Kings Landing
It’s the city where Ned and Co are
Well that is just silly
What a silly name
The king landed there
I suppose that makes a certain amount of sense
It’s where the Targarians started their invasion 300 years prior to the series
That guy was not expecting to be stabbed
Targaryen
Targararan
That looks like a good spelling
Tiger-Anne
ooooh
I get it now
Arya is pretty annoyed that her dance instructor lied to her
Arya, you are better off not going with them
Haha, he is totes going to take them all on with a wooden sword
Or not
DON’T KILL HIM
Don’t be a fool! Dance away! Use your funky skills!
Succession is a complicated and dangerous business, apparently
Who knew?
Woah, Arya just stabbed someone
She will have the best first kill story
First that we KNOW OF
Robin continues to be creepy
Eugh
Robin
“If I’m going to die, may as well do it with a song in my heart”
I love Tyrion
“Though I would treasure your friendship, I’m mainly interested in your facility with murder”
“I like living”
Everybody loves Tyrion
Everything he says is pure gold
He is Peter Dinklage
I know! He’s the best!
“Take the halfman, he can dance for the children”
Jon! Don’t try to kill people just because they make you cross!
Puppy!
Keeping those dogs was a good plan
“dogs”
/dire wolf cubs
That guy seems to be impervious to stabbing
Well this is not good
I mean, it’s pretty good for him
Dany seems to be learning that reclaiming a throne is a bloody business
Dany I am not sure how well your plan will go
What is her plan?
Taking all the women who were to be ‘mounted’
Well, that went not too badly, all things considered
What happened?
The guy who Dany stopped from raping a girl went to complain to Mr Dany, and he was like, “let’s hear this all out” and Dany said her bit and argued, and Mr Dany was like, “my son inside her makes her grow fierce” and then they guy challenged Mr Dany, and he killed the guy and ripped out his tongue
And said Dany can keep her women slaves
That scene was totally radical
It was rather
A Stark puppy saves the day again
That guy is surprisingly chipper giving he just lost too fingers
*two
GEEZ ELIZABETH
It’s Bran’s turn to be Lord of Winterfell
*its Brans tyrn too bee Lard on Summerrise
BETTER?
WELSH IS ALWAYS BETTER
Wylsh ys ylwyys byttyr
yts Bryns tyrn tyy by lyrd yn symmyrysy
BYBY STYRK!
Oh Hodor
So naked
Naked Hodor!
Best Hodor!
Look at Sam, all full of knowledge
It suits him being the smart one
Yay Sam!
Is Theon’s last name Greylord?
Greyjoy
Theon “Thaddeus” Greyjoy
In which case all previous messages referring to him as “probably-Theon” can just be swapped to Theon
And any just referring to Theon can be swapped to… I dunno
Mickey Mouse
That would be a very different show.
Robb, losing does not sound an appealing prospect
I like all the people that Detective Stark just mentioned would be killed if you lost
Heh, I like Shaggar
And the whole hill tribe
“The rumours of your demise were unfounded”
GOSH PAPA LANNISTER NO NEED TO GUSH
Haha
He’s a regular teddy bear
It’s almost embarrassing
Yeah, Tyrion, I was surprised that Robert died too
N’aww, “the little lion”
?
That is the best nickname for Tyrion
ah right
Yay Tyrion!
He is the best
Like, I am generally on the side of the Starks in Stark v. Lannister, but I also love Tyrion
Welcome to the emotional roller coaster that is Game of Thrones
Who is Lord Tywin?
Papa Lannister!
Tywin, father of Tyrion, Ceirsie, Jaimie, and Sir Not-Appearing-in-this-Show
Haha
Making sulky brat king was a bad plan
Dude, you were just given an early retirement, enjoy it, don’t take it so personally
Milk of the poppy! PAPA STARK WAS A DRUGGIE
Well look at that, Sansa’s getting things done
Sansa T. P. Stark
(The P stands for productive)
(The T stands for Tyrannosaurus Rex)
Episode end
Next!
…but bed time
But Game of Thrones!
But Game of Sleep!
But next!
It’s half nine woman, you’re on holiday
I am staying up late
therefore you should also!
I went to bed at half nine for two days, it was because I was emotionally fragile. ARE YOU EMOTIONALLY FRAGILE??
AM I EMOTIONALLY FRAGILE?!
NO! So you don’t need half nine bedtime babes
DO YOU NOT RECALL POOR VISERYS BEING UNFAIRLY MURDERED AFTER BEING PROMISED A PROPER CROWN NOT A CROWN OF DEATH?
PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER
Well, I’ve been doing a nice two-a-night thing, which means I can finish off the first season tomorrow night
Or you could finish it tonight
Just saying
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